Bad Habits

Sundance: Why do humans battle with portion control? I am beginning to see signs of obesity and allergic reactions in most of my human and dog friends. Do the humans think that by eating a super-sized meal they will find happiness? Or by giving their pets large amounts of treats and food they will find a happier connection with us? 


James: Great questions Sundance! Portion control is obviously a societal dilemma. Everywhere I turn, I find children and adults hoarding themselves with food and consuming meals at such a rapid pace. The need to shovel cookies, hamburgers, fries, and chips down one's esophagus is a bit disgusting. I admit, I have committed such food lust and stuffed myself. I threw portion control out the window many times, sometimes out onto the 101 freeway. 

Sundance: But why would you and anyone do this? 


James: I suppose it lies within human nature to be so greedy and to lust for more. It is one of our greatest failures. That, and manufacturers have been upping the sugar, fat, and salt, and connecting sugar-fat-salt to happiness and to positive emotional states. So now people are learning from a young age that what they put in their mouths is tantamount to love, joy, peace, and a fulfilled life. Also, since the recent generations were raised by parents who were to busy while trying to live up to artificial ideals of parenthood, those poor over-stressed parents resorted to the refrigerator as a source of love and comfort for us children. So of course we grow up and do the same for our children--our dogs. 


Sundance: I've seen some owners get their dogs so excited, stimulating the dog's food drive to the point that not even one kibble was chewed. Instead, it's vacuumed into the black hole only to escape out the other end with urgency. 


James: Yes. I strongly believe that our human problems are migrating over to our canine friends. Our stress levels. Our allergic reactions. Our dairy intolerance. Our gluten indulgences. And our carb overload of sweets and refined grains. It's no surprise!


Sundance: Well you know how I see it? I'm a dog, and I've been bred to work. I love to work. And after I work, I'm hungry. I eat a couple cups of food, take a break, then eat a couple more cups. Then I'm done. I've replaced the calories I needed to replace to refuel me, and no more. Then when people offer me those sugar-fat-salt treats you're talking about, I just think of how good I feel, how happy I feel to be loved, and those sickening treats offer no more appeal. Why can't humans do that?


James: We can. We just think we can't. It's like when we were trying to train that crazy imbalanced dog, everyone said it would be impossible or too much work. But we knew that those old desires for imbalance were just bad habits that could be broken down, just like a tobacco addiction. And so it is with food. We're all just dogs with old bad habits who are accustomed to finding joy in food. But the real joy is found in--


Sundance: PUPPIES!!!

Sundance Balls of Joy

Busy people need quick snacks. Unfortunately, the most commonly available snacks contain high levels of sugar. Refined carbohydrates are the worst thing to eat on an empty stomach since eating sweets without proteins and fats causes blood sugar to skyrocket, which sets the body and brain in a downward spiral, making the busy person’s day go down the tubes. The healthy snacks, however, tend to be quite expensive, and home-made snacks tend to require refrigeration. So what is a busy person to do? There are always Sundance Balls. These are delicious snacks that can be made on the weekend and eaten over the next two or three weeks. They are easy to make, requiring simple ingredients and a food processor. Just grind some nuts, blend in some dates, and add whatever little extras for variation, then enjoy a home-made substitute that tastes much better than all those health-bars in the convenience stores.

First, the chef must assemble his ingredients. Three cups of nuts should last the average student a week. Any nuts will do, but almonds are the best base for their texture and mild flavor. A third can be pecans, which add a dessert-y aroma and cookie-dough texture. Any other nuts at hand may be included, too. Measure out about one pinch of salt for every cup of nuts. Six or seven dates will be needed for every cup of nuts, depending on the size of the dates. One must be careful to pit the dates and look for tiny worms that sometimes reside harmlessly within. This can be done with a paring knife, slicing the date from tip to tip, opening with fingers, and inspecting for bug-evidence near the pit. Other ingredients that could be used are chocolate, cinnamon, and raisins.

To add variety, any dried fruits, nuts, or spices can be added for unlimited options. Oatmeal-cookie-dough balls may be made with pecans, cinnamon, and raisins. The chocolate-chip variety will contain chocolate chips, cocoa powder, or cacao beans blended with some walnuts, along with vanilla beans or extract. Dried apricots can add a sour splash to plain balls, and dried plums can add sweetness and fiber. Peanuts can make a peanut-butter-cookie-dough version.

After assembling the ingredients, they need to be blended. The chef must be careful not to overload the food processor: process only as many as it can handle at once. It is a good idea to add the salt and any other dry ingredients at this time to achieve full incorporation. The nuts should be blended until they are the consistency of crumbs. If they are ground to powder, the result will be more like cookie dough than energy bars, which can be delightful.

The chef can then drop the pitted dates in through the shoot, adding one every two or three seconds. Double check to be sure there are no pits, as that can lead to broken teeth once the pits are blended in. Once the dates are incorporated, the mixture will begin to bind together in a dough. This would be a good time to add raisins, if they are desired.

The final step is shaping the Sundance balls. The chef should prepare a clean, shallow container in which to refrigerate the final product so he doesn’t have to go searching with dirty hands. He may want to first apply a light spray of cooking oil to his hands to minimize sticking. The food processor’s blade needs to be removed so the Sundance Balls don’t end up blood-flavored. Then the chef will pick up a clump of the dough, about the size of a cookie, and roll it into a ball. If the chef’s hands become tired, he may get lazy and roll small log- or turd-shaped lumps for simplicity and effect. Once all the product is rolled, the remaining dough may be licked from the hands. If the chef has an abundance of time and wants to be fancy, he may roll the balls in or sprinkle them with cocoa powder, cinnamon, or coconut, depending on the ingredients. Then the balls or turds may be covered and placed in the refrigerator to firm up a bit.

Once the balls are chilled, they may be enjoyed at any time, in any place. Six balls can be placed in a waxed-paper bag and tossed into a backpack to be enjoyed throughout the day. The oatmeal-cookie-dough balls can go with tea, or be served as desert in a snap. The chocolate-chip variety is wonderful for study sessions, or simply to quell the munchies. And the best things about Sundance Balls, besides the delicious taste and texture, is they are a balanced source of energy, they have fiber and nutrients, and they don’t cost $3.97 for a two-ounce bar. Or, perhaps the best part may be the opportunities for humor among friends as you pop a small, brown, oblong thing into your mouth and everyone asks, “What’s that?” and you answer, “I made it myself, on Saturday. Want to try one?”